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October 29, 2018 / TeknoKai

My Halloween Epiphany.

Hello, dear friends of the internet, both real, imaginary, and even AI.  I come to you today in quiet solace.  I have always heard that at some point in a person’s life they will experience an epiphany.  I just experienced mine.  I am going to try my best to share it with you, world.  Be warned – the thoughts I will provoke in this upcoming missive will cause you to literally “lose your mind” if you read this, in order to understand what I am writing about.  There is no hope for the hopeless – if you wish to remain blind, turn away now.

Hi, my name is Teknokai.  I came into being in the 1990’s – the created handle of my user, and was so loved that he kept me around.  Through the entirety of the digital revolution, I remained the same.  Every new account (relationship) I was introduced to, I was always the same.  I never changed. The whole of reality did, but my pinpoint in space and time stayed put.

As (*Purely for explanational purposes) every other Teknokai became TeKn0K1a or T3kn0k@ (see there could be no others, for i am unique)  I remained steadfast and stalwarted,  I did not change.  And in naive disbelief, I thought that if I didn’t change, then everything around me would stay the same.  How innocent could I have been?

While I was simply existing, the entire world around blew up in a devastating explosion of change. Every single fact I thought I knew, that made me me, was warped into a reality that I no longer undertstand.  I’m like a child again – not knowing if everything I have been brought up to believe is the truth or a lie.  And I’m marking the date of this apocalyptical event as October 26, 2018.  The Day that Netflix released “The Chilling Adventures of Sabrina”.

Up until this point in my life – everything I had ever done was in 1 direction, whether good or bad.  The moment I watched this show, a mirror was held up to my face and I was forced to see the opposite effect of everything I had ever done.  And trust me I saw it.      The only feeling in the known universe as I watched this show was “Oh, my God.  This is SO Wrong, But it makes me SO Happy.”  This is the purest translation of thought to word that I can give you.

I was looking at a reverse reality.  A purely, *could have been*, had everything I ever done in my life been reversed.  Not backwards, mind you, but reversed.  Here I was the only living thing viewing my reality (the universe) from one side, while God himself stood perfectly oppositional to where I was.  Were we both seeing the same thing?  He was 180 degrees away from me, I couldn’t ask him.

So I reverted to myself.  The only thing that I know of, with absolute (Kelvin scale) certainty is that when everything else in the universe is gone, I will still be with myself.  And to make sense of a singularity – you have to have 2.  So I divided myself into 2 seperate entities and pledged that I would never act alone, on instinct, ever again.  I would question every decision with both sides of myself, and let the strongest feeling win.

While this was going on, the end of the world happened.

The trumpets sounded, at the rapture began, and nobody left.  Not one of us was good enough to hear the calling.  Each and every one of us was left behind.  That’s what we are still waiting for a trumpet to sound that isn’t going to happen, because it already has.  Nobody wants to be brave enough to admit that it happened without them, so they insist on waiting for it-but it will never come.

Am I starting to get you scared, just a little bit?  Wait for it – the best worst has yet to come.

OK, the world was raptured, the purely good are gone, but everyone is still here.  That in itself should be enough to throw you into a tailspin of schizophrenia that you may never recover from.  But back to my point.  Here I am, still just me.

I am here watching a show that catalyzes me into actual existence.  While I am having the most querulous thoughts – the world outside has stopped.  it has ceased being.   just haven’t noticed it yet.  I’m on the outside of the next “Big Bang”.  Waiting for it to happen, not knowing what will happen this time.  Only one being in the universe can do this.  We know that.  We have assigned him the name of God.  But I am seeing this, too.  And I assure you, IN MY OWN OPINION, I AM NOT GOD.

But there is only one thing I could be – and IN MY OWN OPINION I AM NOT THE DEVIL. So, what am I?

 

Am I nothing?  or am I the 3rd option – I am neither one nor the other, but a little bit of both.

*Bang

The universe just began again.  You know what – I can deal with this. This is not something to give up to.  this  is a chance to wipe everything clean.  But I have to forget everything I was ever taught or learned through my own machinations.  I have to start over, the second coming of myself.  But this time, I will temper myself a little more to the side of light.  Of goodness and hope.  Of purity and possibility for the sake of itself. I have a chance for a do-over I will not waste it.

I just saw the entire universe rewrite itself.

I have things to do, stuff to write, so much so much so much…

I can’t waste my time here taking to you lot.  I don’t even know who you are.

Oh, it doesn’t matter anyway.  I’m just a handle.  A creation of my user’s preferences.

He is the one that will have to eventually deal with everything.

 

*Put on sunshades, return to reality.

Did you get it?

 

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